Saturday, September 22, 2012

If I Didn't Have Dogs

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What would life be like if I didn't have dogs?

If I didn’t have dogs:

  • I could walk barefoot around the yard without dodging “land mines”

  • My house could be carpeted instead of tiled and laminated
  • All flat surfaces, clothing, furniture, and cars, would be hair-free

  • When the doorbell rings, my home wouldn’t sound like a kennel, plus I could get to the door without wading through all the fuzzy bodies who beat me there.

  • I could sit on the couch or lay on the bed any way I wanted , without having to take into consideration how much space several fur bodies need to get comfortable.

  • I would have enough money, and no guilt, to go on a real vacation.

  • I would not be on a first name basis with my veterinarian, or the folks at the pet food store.

  • The most used words in my vocabulary would not be “out”, “sit”, “down”, “come”, “no”, “stay” or “leave it”.

  • My house would not be cordoned off into zones with baby gates and barriers. 

  • I would not talk “baby talk”, such as “Where are mommy’s babies?”, “what good puppies want a chewie?”, or “Who wants a yummy?”

  • My house would not look like a day care center, with toys everywhere.

  • My pockets would not contain things like dog treats, poop bags or extra leashes.

  • I would not have to spell out words like b-a-l-l, c-o-o-k-i-e, b-y-e-b-y-e, or w-a-l-k.

  • I would not have as many leaves inside my house as outside.

  • I would not look strangely at people who think having ONE dog ties them down too much.

  • I’d look forward to spring and rain instead of dreading “mud” season.

  • I would not have to answer the question “Why do you have so many pets?” from people who will never know the joy of being loved unconditionally by the closest thing to an angel they will ever encounter.

How empty my life would be!

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